October 9, 2005
OH MY GOSH ... BETTY'S DEAD ???
What are we going to do ???
+ + + +
Its like a religion .... the way we approach our coffee.
How many times have you heard someone say "The day
hasn't officially started until I have my coffee" .. or
"Without that first cup in the morning .. I'm a bear" or
some other description that underlines how important that
dose of caffeine is to them.
Coffee .... it IS the new spirituality. People used to begin
their day with a prayer, maybe even a quiet time of bible-
reading and reflection, which would help to start their day
in just the right context.
But somewhere along the way ... things changed.
Prayer at the start of the day was replaced with coffee.
As society evolved, we were encouraged to be more
productive with our time ... and so coffee pots with timers
were made (so we wouldn't "waste" time while the coffee
brewed - it would start while we slept, or when we got in
the shower - and we would be spared the indignity of
having to wait for something and waste time). And then
even that took too long so instant coffee was created.
Time management ... efficiency ... that was what it was all
about. And so, in order to not waste time for coffee (our
new necessity of life) to make it into our system ... we
found a new way to save time. We started paying people to
MAKE our coffee for us.
And that is when the landscapes of our cities changed.
Years ago ... in the post-war days when St. Andrew's was
built ... there was literally a church at every corner. But
now .... in this new hurry up and go world, the churches
have been replaced with coffee shops ... in some towns the
old churches now ARE coffee shops.
It IS a religion. But unlike Godly religion (where we are
taught patience and faith and trust that God will work in
God's own time) this NEW religion preaches "the sooner
the better".
Places where the coffee is always ready, and we don't have
to wait long for our gratification ... we don't even have to
get the water out of the tap. Its there in a cup as soon as we
say the word (and, if you are a frequent enough visitor, you
don't even have to say the word - they know).
In some places you don't even have to get out of your car -
just drive around and there it is. Hot and ready to enjoy.
And just as we Christian people fall into one of two camps
(catholic or protestant) I have observed that there are two
kinds of people in the Coffee World. Tim Hortons people,
and Starbucks people.
The Hortons people are the social folks. You walk into
their place and there is always a buzz of activity. Groups of
people gathered around a table, drinking their coffee and
swapping the latest news and stories and jokes. There never
seems to be a quiet moment there ... no matter what time
of the day you go.
And if you didn't know anyone when you went in, you
usually did when you left (whether you wanted to or not).
Conversations would sometimes get so loud at the next
table that you couldn't help but listen in ... and at other
times folks would just start talking to each other about any
number of subjects. The staff often join in, and become as
much a part of the discussion as the customers.
The Starbucks people are the more contemplative folks.
Most come in alone (or with one other person). They sit
quietly at their table and read, or work on their laptop, or
rest (I have never seen someone asleep at Tim's - but I
often see that happen at Starbucks). Starbucks people
acknowledge one another, but seldom do they get into
conversations about anything. The staff are quiet and
efficient, and very rarely invade the customers solitude.
Well what does all of this have to do with anything? Let
alone Thanksgiving or God or why we're here. And what
does ANY of it have to do with BETTY (whoever she is)
and the fact that she is dead ?
I'm coming to that.
I have been in many conversations (maybe too many)
where the success of those Coffee Joints has been
examined. And the point is usually made that the Church
could learn a lot from them. How when the world changed,
the coffee places changed with them.
When society became more health conscience, decaff was
introduced, and for those who don't like coffee at all ...
there is a choice for them too (water or tea or any number
of juices) and biscuits rather than donuts, and lunch (soup
and salad with your beverage of choice).
Sure all of this comes at a price. Financial and otherwise.
But people don't seem to mind. They continue to pay, and
they don't seem to mind that they now spend more time in
line waiting for their coffee than it would have taken them
to make it at home, and they don't seem to mind that one
cup of the stuff costs more than one pound of beans -
which would make enough coffee for you and your family
for two weeks.
They don't mind, because Coffee People are faithful
people. Sometimes even more faithful than Church people.
Or so I thought ....
Last week, I stopped into a Tim's for a coffee. The line was
long. And as I waited there was the usual buzz of people at
the tables and around me.
And just as I was starting to think that my friends might be
right modeling ourselves after St. Timothy's ... a woman
walked in. And she waved at the woman behind the
counter.
"I thought you were retiring?" she asked
"No, not for a few years yet" came the answer
"Oh well .... Where's Betty? Is she off today"
"Betty died" came the answer from behind the counter.
"OH MY GOSH ... BETTY'S DEAD ??? What are we
going to do ???"
The woman looked to be in shock.
"I'm a regular here, it just wont be the same without her".
At this point almost every eye in the place was focused on
this woman in her grief. Wondering what we could do to
console her. Obviously she was close to Betty, and would
miss her terribly ...
The woman behind the counter looked her in the eye and
said "I'm sorry - but she died last June, there's nothing
more we CAN do ... haven't you noticed she's been gone
for four months".
The customer's look changed from grief to embarrassment.
"Well she was here the last time I came in" she said quietly,
and then mumbling to herself she went to the back of the
line.
And as she stood there, two men at a table near me started
talking:
1 - Who was SHE ???
2 - I dunno - but apparently she's a regular here
1 - Well I don't EVER remember seeing HER in here, but
then again, I've only been coming here every morning for
the past SEVEN years .. so what do I know.
2 - You knew Betty was dead didn't ya (and they laughed)
And it struck me that maybe we SHOULDN'T model the
church after the coffee shops after all.
Because it was then that I began to see in HER all those
"regulars" of other places of worship.
Those who see themselves as regulars or mainstays or "life
members" ... when in reality they haven't really been
connected to the place as often or as frequently as they
think.
Those who believe (sometimes very innocently) that the
world revolves around them. Who expect that because
THEY remember something one way, that the rest of us
do as well.
The people who still claim membership or privilege or
special status of a place they have barely attended, yet who
hold very strong opinions and are shocked when the reality
of the place contradicts their memory of it.
Coffee isn't God.
Getting your order in two minutes at a drive-thru rather
than waiting for it to perk in your kitchen REALLY doesn't
have that great an impact on your life.
And while I personally prefer the contemplative nature of
my local Starbucks, I also appreciate the community
atmosphere that I see from time to time at Tim's.
And NONE of what I just said, changes the fact that Betty
is Dead, or the fact that this woman was shocked -- or will
miss her (in her own way).
What matters MOST, is .... That WE recognize that too.
And use our days (not just the One day we designate each
year) to identify the blessings we have received, and to take
the time to recognize them and appreciate them.
And then to take a moment to give thanks to the One who
gave them to us. And then to live our lives in ways that will
show the rest of the world how grateful we are, so that they
too may come to know that its not about STUFF at all.
But about something much much bigger .....
